Thursday, March 13, 2008

Quick, Someone Call Chris Hansen!

In speech class the other night we were supposed to give a ceremonial speech. It had to be either a toast, eulogy or award speech. Everyone was just rolling along, kinda of doing some humorous stuff, until this one guy walks up.

Now, in the interest of brevity, I'll try and summarize this. He said this eulogy was fictional. OK. He then goes into this story of how he was in high school, was offered a ride home by a fellow student. Person driving is a 70 year old man named "Bruce." Bruce offers kid ride home again tomorrow. Kid declines. Bruce is waiting there next day anyway, outside the school. Continues to wait for kid to give him "rides" and "talk." Kid graduates high school and moves an hour + away. "Bruce" makes sure to come and visit him at least once a month for afternoon delight lunch and brings presents on birthdays. That's enough right there I think. Oh, but I did forget to mention this kid's got a wicked facial tick and can't make eye contact with anyone during the speech.

Now, during said speech numerous people and I all exchanged glances along with uncomfortable squirming in our chairs. I mean, it wasn't just me. This sounded like a retelling of a seriously traumatic incident from this kid's childhood. It was just...weird.

I think I would have gone w/ a different angle for a "fake" story.

5 comments:

TK said...

What. The. FUCK?

That's just creepy.

And hey, look at Big-Pants, posting twice in the same week!

Anonymous said...

I had a kid I went to high school with busted on the first Dateline "To Catch A Predator" show. We spent all of Super Bowl 40's halftime downloading the video and watching it repeatedly while mocking him. Good times.

country roads said...

You want a popsicle? (said like the old guy from Family guy)

Redhead said...

Hey, this guy was obviously looking for some free therapy, and you got another (showoff) blog post out of it. Everybody wins!

MsPuddin said...

Ditto on creepy, that’s the kid in class you need to bring candy, because when he comes to class one day and decides to kill everyone, he’ll remember you’re the guy who gave him the candy…(jacked from Dan Cook, but so true)…